Blah, Blah, Blah

Is it just me or does there seem to be a complete lack of authenticity in our current culture? It just feels like everyone is just going through the motions at this point. In a world where every action has a sponsor, how do we find the genuine article? Have our minds been atrophied to the point that we wouldn’t be able to read it if we did. Oh, that reminds me: this blog is brought to you by Goldschlager and Marty’s Good Time Crab Shack.

When I say “genuine”, I am referring to a television show, movie, book, album, flyer, or car that isn’t just geared, made, or said to garner profit. The word altruism is now just something that writers throw around to sound educated. I understand capitalism. It’s the foundation of the American Dream. I get that and I also get that no one plays to lose (i.e. not making money). However, this tarnishes the final product for me when it is so obvious that it was done solely for profit. Everything feels profit-driven; everything feels fake. There are no more “for the love” acts. Everyone is searching for that big break, that elusive, ever-so-addictive 15 minutes of fame. What ever happened to “just for the hell of it?”

Take the internet. In its infancy, it was a wild, disorganized mess similar to Drew Barrymore in her teens. There was a wealth of information, activities, and blogs (not named “blogs” at the time but the same design) for free. No one was getting paid. It was the essence of “just for the hell of it”. You see, when you take profit and self-aggrandizement out of the equation, there is nothing to get in the way of love and respect. Would you rather root for the basketball player that takes a pay cut just to help a team win a championship or a mercenary for hire that plays for the checks? Ill give you a sec…….Yep, I thought so. When the cost of living goes up and that paycheck doesn’t have the same impact it once did, you get a professional athlete putting up bush league performances.

That is one of the reasons “Seinfeld” was so popular. It perfectly captured the zeitgeist of nothingness. There were no motives for the characters, just living life. And so came off as genuine because it had that “just for the hell of it” appeal. But, you say, “It IS a superior product and Larry David and the rest of the cast were insanely paid for it.”

Well, you are right. Like I mentioned before no one plays to lose; not to mention that I AM indirectly getting paid for this blog (*cough* click the banner ads *cough*). Maybe it’s not the money-grubbing mentality of our nation. That’s just the effect. The cause of the problem is apathy. The “there’s no point in doing anything if it’s not for the money” mentality. To quote the well-known street professor, Curtis Jackson (50 cent), “if you ain’t talking about money homie, I ain’t concerned.” BINGO! The total lack of caring in our culture is robbing us of emotional enrichment, satisfaction, and comfort. So much so that everything is just business now. And, THAT’S what’s making me feel so empty. Without heart, soul, and love, everything just comes off as blah, blah, blah. And, what better illustration is there than 1,500 or so words about absolutely nothing. I guess content is pretty important too.

Charity work for college grads

If you are a college grad out in the workforce, you have a civic duty to fulfill. Go back to your alma mater, or talk to your college-aged friends and relatives, or even your local high-schoolers. Tell everyone to enjoy their college experience no matter what situation they’re in. Tell everyone to relish the moment while they can. Scream it from the hills, the steeples, and valleys. I know, I know. When you are counting pennies to buy a 25 cent bag of chips or emptying your bank account by withdrawing $5.73 cents, it’s kind of hard to see the benefit in college life. But, put this is in your pipe and smoke it (see, you could even get away with doing THAT in school!).When is the last time you just didn’t show up for work? Hmm? No calls, No emails, just didn’t come in. I am not saying try this, after all, you do need money to pay for the internet or library fees, depending on your situation, to view this blog(can anyone say "comma fault"?). Now, think about that 8 o’clock class where you copied the notes from classmates and only showed up for tests. Yep, that would be nice right about now right, huh? College is the most free you will ever be. And the sad thing is many students never realize this.

Besides, no matter how happy you are at your job, every one of us has pined for those one-class days, drunken escapades, and utter abandon that only college life can provide. I was too focused on grades (not that there’s anything wrong with that. That’s what you are there for) and too scared to do any partying for fear of ending up like a Valerie-Bertinelli after-school special. That was up until my sophomore year when one of my college buddies graduated. There was nothing sadder than the first time I called him to hang out and he hit me with this bombshell: “No, I can’t play Madden ’03 and spades until 3 o’clock in the morning tonight. I have to work tomorrow.” Devastating, just plain devastating. After that, I took the bull by the horns and enjoyed the rest of my tenure, but I couldn’t help feeling I had missed too many hangovers and one-night stands.

When you talk to the kids, tell them they don’t have to make a drunken idiot of themselves (very underrated, by the way). Tell them they don’t have to get into drugs or have salacious one night stands(again, very underrated). They could just study and go to class. But, be especially sure to tell them: whatever you do, relish this moment. Stop and smell the flowers because before you know it, the petals are dead and nothing is left but thorns (don’t you just love a good Rose metaphor?). Do your part my friends. I will definitely do mine!

Bruce Eagle the full metal. Peace!!!

JACK DANIELS!!!!

No post really. I just wanted to give my drinking buddy a shout-out.

Bruce Eagle the Full Metal. Peace!!!

Why you stressing, geesh? You want a cigarette?

"It's like smoking brings a few people just a little bit of joy, and [they]want to take it from them"--Cartman, south park...

I swear if one more person comes up to me on the street while I am smoking a cigarette and says, "you know those are bad for you", i am going to lose it. WOOOOWWW, REALLY? Thank you C. Everett Freaking Koop. If you hadn't come along I would have never known b/c I haven't read a paper or seen a news program or seen one of those cheesy "Truth commercials" in the past, oh i dont know, 17 years...

If you havent figured it out yet, I am smoker. I am not too proud of it and I know it's not healthy, but you know what, you gotta die from something. If I never smoked a cigarette and got hit by a bus at 25, what are you gonna say? "Man that bus really creamed him but at least his lungs weren't black." This is a foul habit, I know. My breath stinks pretty much all the time. My lips are getting black(if you cant tell from my pic i am pretty dark as it is). But, I dont care. Not in the first.

There is one and only one thing that truly irks me about the smoker/non-smoker relationship. Its not that I can't, as Cedric the entertainer said, "smoke a square on earth anymore." I actually like that rule b/c as hypocritical as it sounds, I hate 2nd hand smoke(like my smoke first hand, thank you!). Let's not front like this new rule is solely for health reasons. It may be a little bit, but there is no definitive link between second hand smoke and lung cancer. Only 2% of lung cancer patients are non-smokers(and maybe just maybe that is caused by the poison in our air that is far worse than a little stinky smoke). So, if this second hand smoke is causing all this cancer, where are the numbers? Think about this for a minute: If smokers are inhaling all the carcinogens, just what exactly are you inhaling? Smoke and breath is all. People just hate it and quite frankly, I dont blame them. So while I hate smoking in 15 degree weather, I know its for the best.

Its not that they keep raising the tax on cigarettes, either. They say that it is to curb smoking. That smells like the kind of B.S. Bill clinton lays on Hilary everytime he interviews a new intern. Do the people raising the taxes know anything about addiction. Raising the price on cigarettes will do nothing but make us pay more. We are not gonna stop. Have you ever had a strung out junkie try to sell you a 15 dollar ipod? Whatever the price is, an addict will get that product by hook or by crook, and if they need to steal the hook, so be it. So, dont come at me with the raise taxes to curb smoking thing. You know and i know that aint what its about. Now give me my 7 dollar pack of cigs b/f i come behind that counter...ok, ok im cool. im cool...

Its not any of that that gets my fire up. Its the freaking sanctimony non-smokers have toward smokers, that "holier than thou" attitude. You should see their smug faces when they say "you should stop"...No, YOU should START maybe then I can take 5 mins to hit a CI in peace. Ask yourself if your life is THAT much better? True, your breath doesn't stink(or maybe it does but not of tar) and you may live longer(emphasis on MAY), but when you get stressed out, what do you do? Take it out on your friends and family? Break something? And, besides you aren't any better than a smoker b/c:

Let's face it, every one in this society nowadays is addicted to something. There are 17 year olds that freak out if they leave their cell phone at home. Addiction. There are execs that cant go 10 mins without checking their blackberry. Addiction. There are ppl that will pee in your orange juice if you even talk to them before that morning coffee fix. Addiction. And do i even need to go into our nations weight problem? So, yes smoking is annoying but now that we are outside(and walking through a cloud of smoke will not give you lung cancer missy so wipe that stank look off your face) and now that we have to sell our blood go get a pack of squares, why must you still get in our face about smoking...Sheesh you cant even smoke in PG-13and below(not that I think Nemo should be sparking up, but you get the point) movies .

We are killing ourselves not you. So, mind your own business and go fix the worlds other problems first. I think some underage teen somewhere is listening to that hippity hop. And, once all those are properly taken care of, then and only then can you come back to the smokers(yeah that means you you silly guys in the truth commercial. Do you really think execs on the 40th floor can hear your little bullhorn). We just might listen to you, but you better do it after our cigarette. We can get pretty snippy without one...

Bruce Eagle the full metal Peace!!!

Loquacious Levity 1-17-08

Hey...

if you have more than one mouse for your computer, do you call them mice...whats the deal on that...

But i guess the more pressing question would then be...what the hell are you doing with more than one mouse? you think you are better than everyone else or something..

its amazing how fast and accurate i can type when drunk...

have you ever noticed when you are drinking and urinate you aren't as drunk any more...

why dont coaches lose it in press conferences anymore...Denny green was classic...oh and Mora's "playoffs!, pssh, Playoffs" was classic...where is bobby knight? are they sedating him?

have you seen the Sports Guy Archives on ESPN? No? Good you dont know i am ripping him off...

But he probably ripped someone else off...

Someone said there is no original thought in the world...think about that for a sec. Humans have been on earth for a while now...we are at roughly 7 billion ...that sarcastic thought you just thought...was thought by someone in indochina...

i think i just broke the record for saying "thought" in a sentence...

is it just me or should the Guiness book of world records, start to reject some records...really? Hopping in one place? That's what's hot in the street?...

Do you know the phoenetic term for words that begin with an "F": FRICATIVE

Ask yourself: do you have the job security of Isiah Thomas...?

I know i spelled his name wrong but damn it...I am going to take a stand right now against these weirdly spelled names...

how can you get poetic license on a damn name?...

You ever had a "Scrubs" moment you know when someone is talking to you and you automatically tilt your head to the right and drift off into space with an elaborate staging of your imaginations...if so, sue for copyright enfringement...

if you are a man and could be a woman or are a woman and could be a man...why would you do it?...i mean you would just be a mangled version of what you are right now...

Just for the hell of it: Martini glasses and lubrication...

Yes i am biting Tim Keown AND Bill simmons

This is a bit late but i love poetic license...its something you can't buy, you just have to take...

on that Note my son's name will be said like Al-Ven...but i am going to spell it like 7uyf...classic...don t bite it either...ima be mad...

ummm...fight club, inside man, Godfather two, titanic, and traffic...

thats it...over 1K words about absolutely nothing...YOU'RE WELCOME!!!!

BruceEagle the full metal. Peace!!!

Hello,Hola, Jambo..

First off lets get this straight. "BruceEagle" is my p-orn name(middlename plus the street I grew up on). I am NOT an eagle fan. I like Donnie Mac and Westbrook but by and large i dont get down with them...Over the next few months to years or whenever someone decides to hire me as a writer, I will peroidcally check in to give the world all that is Alvin...I know its confusing...sorry i refer to myself by my first name not my psuedonym...with that said, i love ellipses, get used to it you will see them all the time...The will be not edit this, unless its real time, this is a stream of consciousness blog...and this will(see what did i tell you about the ellipses) be anything i decide to write

(okay so i lied. this is an edit. if you cant understand my sentences what is the pt of writing? I left the other sentence just to F with you).

That means i can talk about how Nas is my fav. rappper but how he wilds out from time to time when he doesnt get enough attention...I might have a post about the democrats being str8(oh yeah, mad butter, shizzle slang will be present as well) pussies, I may just blow off some steam. Sometimes i may just complain about some shit to get off my chest so that i wont spazz out. Sometimes i may come through and complain but give suggestions for the bettement of all man kind...thats right all mankind...umm what else do you need to know...

ohyeah, i am an aspiring artist(not rapper that is so cliche) so you may get a verse or two..you may get some drunk posts you may get some salient posts..but i promise it will be entertaining...so uh-ra...welcome and i am glad you decided to read the senile ramblings of a manchild...if you like it tell your friends( i am also an aspiring writer. I need to stop aspiring and actually decide to be someting but thats for when i grow up...) Oh and the title of this post is from a childrens show i saw when i was a kid called "eureka's castle" it was a song saying hello in various languages...Hell of a song stuck with me for like 20 yrs...

BruceEagle the full metal(ill explain that, the blog title, and the URL later. I think its best to leave them esoteric for right now. Keep you in suspense) Peace!!!!