"We don't believe you...

you need more people." Jay-Z


Max Payne as a viable form of entertainment...sorry, you need more people...(Jesus, that movie was awful...Maybe, I didn't get it b/c i didn't really play the ga...nah it was just terrible)


Barack Obama's "redistribution of wealth" line of political theory as socialism...sorry you need more people.(Yes, redistribution of wealth is a tenet of socialism, hence, the SOCIAL part of the "ism", but its not totally socialism. We are not totally capitalist, either. If that were so then AMTRAK wouldn't be owned and operated by the government. No one nation operates purely in one economic theory. Its usually a mix. And besides, what is so damn bad about THAT...how do you think the wealthy get wealthy? hmm? they perform or sell a service or goods(well the legal ones anyway) and we, the public, pay for it. Now, when tax time comes around, the execs and the company itself are taxed easier relative to income than the people who helped make the company and the execs rich. How is that fair? What Obama wants to do is tax the people with the most money MORE and tax the common folk less relative to income, thereby compromising so that the government can makes its money, we commoners can keep ours, and those who can AFFORD it make the bill. Now, if this does happen we will have to make sure that the money is going back into the economy and not some politicians pocket but we'll have to cross that when we come to it).


The past 8 years have been the new millennium...sorry you need more people(between the rapidly growing disparity b/t the rich and the poor, the rampant use prescription drugs and Ecstasy(the explosion of crack), a very evil president and cabinet(Reagan administration), and a stock market crash, you can't tell me the last 8 years haven't been the 80's. Could've fooled me)



Arby's...sorry you need more people...(come the hell on now, Arbys. Are you serious? Who in the hell needs that much roast beef?)


KFC as a franchise...sorry you need more people...(No, no no...KFC is not a franchise. They are cold blooded bastards...First we had that melange of arterial blockery with that meal bowl and now they are passing out that Sampler box filled to the brim with stroke fodder. Seriously, doesn't KFC know who they are dealing with? We are Amercians, for Christ Sakes. You put that much food in front of us we are going to eat it! All of it. KFC needs to realize their responsibility and stop giving us so much delicious savory good-oh-so goodness b/f we eat ourselves to death. And do something about that nasty ass gravy, too...on that note...)


White gravy...sorry you need more people...(WRAPS!!! Gravy is soul brother brown...you can kill that white gravy noise. Dang, cant we have anything as a people without white folks taking it? First you take our music and now you take our gravy? Well, I am taking a stand: NO MORE WHITE GRAVY!!! Petition at your local CRACKER Barrell...)


Max payne as a viable form of entertainment...sorry, you need more people. (Um... yeah its that bad...)

People that want the game of baseball to stay the same...sorry you need more people(Come on y'all you don't think baseball needs a little tweaking every now and then? It's 150 years old. We even change the damn constitution more than we change Baseball. What else has stayed the same for the last 100 years other than racism and American flag? You can talk to an elderly dementia patient and they will tell you how they still hate the DH rule. Its like you can't touch baseball at all. If you say, "hey maybe we should cut back on the approximately 185 thousand games you play a season." You get aback, "no, no no..." I just don't understand it.)

Inspirational Black/white movies as a good idea...sorry you need more people...(Ok, we get it. White folks use to ban black athletes...Black athletes just wanted to play...Black neighborhoods got a much needed boost in confidence and the spirits of an entire race were lifted by that one shot or home run or touchdown catch...Inner City schools are rough...White people cant dance and black people can...Urban youth just need someone who cares...blah blah blah, we get it. Enough already)

Frank Caliendo as a comedic genius...sorry you need more people(I just don't...I just hate this man and I can't even explain it...)

Li'l Wayne as a lyricist of the year nominee...sorry you need more people(come on now...I like wayne songs like the next man, but the negro spent the last 7 mths or so...sighing and speaking unintelligibly. How in the hell are the histrionics lyricism? Entertainer of the year, YES but not lyricist. Niggas, please. NAS needs lyricist of the year for the "Untitled" album. He made an album we needed to hear not wanted to hear. )

Republicans are doing all they can to win this election...sorry you need more people(I am convinced now. The repubs are throwing this election. Its like they are not even trying. The strategy is just awful. The candidates in the primary this year were just awful. And, Sarah Palin. Really? This is the best you can find? She is cute and all, but she ain't that damn cute to get away with being that damn stupid. This is not the repub political machine I am used to. They are treating this like a CLASS president election...)

Iraq has weapons of mass destruction...sorry you need more people(I know I know, it's been proven that they didn't have so much, as chris rock would say, a wiffle ball bat, but I can't let that shit go. EVER. We got gassed and manipulated so hard you would have thought we were a fledgling rap star or something. I reiterate: HOW DO YOU NOT GET IMPEACHED FOR THAT CRAP?On that note...)

Those who believe a soldier is a soldier...sorry you need more people(No, a soldier is not a soldier. A soldier is a HUMAN BEING. Try this: instead of saying over 3500 soldiers have died in the Iraq war, say over 3500 people have died. Doesn't that sound much worse? We look at our soldiers as employees which, to a certain extent, is correct, but what other employee has to go that far beyond the call of duty? Died for FedEx lately? People get up in arms about protesting a war like its disrespecting the troops. NO, this isn't the 70's. Yes, it did get a bit out of hand during the 70's like it was the soldier's fault we were in Vietnam, but not now. And, if you haven't done so just thank a soldier for doing what I and probably you too are too scared to do. But, how about we REALLY respect our troops and send them to fight and win a war that MATTERS? How's that for respect: Dying for a good cause and not for some Geo-economic bullshit. on that note...)

People who say soldiers are dying to protect our freedom...sorry you need more people(Really, who in the hell is threatening our freedoms anyway? Our freedom to be as fat as we want, our freedom to be as greedy as we want, our freedom to carry guns that could take out an aircraft. No, those are safe. Now, I will admit that our freedom to make a living wage, our freedom to have or not have a kid, our freedom to be intoxicated by anything we damn well please, our freedom to have a private phone conversation, our freedom to properly elect a president is being threatened, but by our own government, not any foreign entity. You wanna fight? Fight the branches of government who have quietly been taking our REAL freedoms for decades now. A soldier has not died on foreign soil to "protect our freedoms" since the second World War.)

Bruce Eagle will lose a quarter of his material after this administration...sorry you..actually I will. This last 8 years may have been a rubric for efficient human rights violations, but it has also been a boon for us bloggers. What in the hell are we going to do after this administration? Man, I feel like frank caliendo here...well, at least I can spend more time talking about farts and boobies so maybe its not all bad...


Bruce Eagle the full metal. Peace!!!

"Out Damned Spot!"

Shakespeare and I haven't really gotten along since we were introduced about, oh, 10 years ago in high school. I don't think his prose is all that special. He's just got the benefit of obsolescent language, which makes it harder to understand thereby giving an esoteric feel to something that, at the time of its creation, was common language. Shakespeare wrote for generally uneducated masses, but he has some of the most timeless topics and issues in his plays and sonnets. He has a sonnet that pretty much reams his old lady a new one for about 14 lines, but the last two are pretty much "she's all I got and I love her so the other crap doesn't matter." Isn't that relationships in a nutshell? Your partner says and does some of the dumbest crap this side of a Texas Air Guard deserter, but at the end of the day, that person makes you happy so nothing else matters in the grand scheme of things.


Nowhere in Shakespeare's writing are the concepts as timeless as his tragedies because Ipod, walkman, phonograph, to traveling minstrel to any other advance or change throughout history, the one constant is tragedy. In each of these tragedies, there is a tragic hero, our protagonist, if you will (if I sound too 11th grade English, just bear with me. There is going to be a point in here somewhere). Some poor smhuck is going to fall victim to one of the timeless pitfalls of humanity. Zealotry (Macbeth), Lovesickness/Heartbreak (Marc Antony), Greed (Lady Macbeth), Treachery from those you thought were your friends (Othello), the Pit falls of being on top/treachery (Hamlet). In essence, Greed and treachery. And, what defines the human experience quite like greed and treachery.

In all of the Shakespeare tragedies, the tragic hero is ALWAYS warned of dangers to come. It's just this danger is usually delivered by a fool, drunkard, witch, hobo, vagabond, hoser, leper, or Cubs fan, which is then summarily tossed aside by the tragic hero. Bad move. ALWAYS. The most important note about this is that the advice/admonishment is ALWAYS dead on. This is a hard fact of life. Many times advice or warnings are shrugged off because the source isn't cool enough or fly enough or wizened enough or old enough or young enough. Think about this: How many times were your parents EXACTLY right when giving advice about life? Advice you didn’t listen to but ultimately should've.

It doesn't matter where the knowledge comes from as long as it comes. The medium by which information is delivered IS NOT more important than the information itself. Where, as a people, did we get to the point that if our information does not come from a flashy format we do not take it as valid? We are thinking with our eyes and not our mind. If Gabrielle union is wearing a trash bag, at the end of the day, isn’t she still gabby freaking union? This is not to say that you should be getting your medical advice from the guy outside the liquor store or legal advice from the neighbor's drunk uncle, but at least take the time to process the information before you write it off. Look at it like the difference between cigar and cigarette smoke. Cigarette smoke is inhaled (swallowed) while cigar smoke is exhaled without fully swallowing the smoke.

Take in all information you recieve at first. Roll it around a bit. Research it if you deem necessary. If it isn't a complete load of horse hockey, then swallow it down. If its hot gah-bage, spit it back. Ask the right questions. Challenge people. "Hey, a snot rocket to the eye socket doesn't sound like it will cure cancer." "I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I don’t think we should give folks who just lost billions of dollars more billions and think its going to be alright." But, give it a chance first. Just because a republican said it, doesn’t mean it isn’t true. Just because a democrat said it doesn’t make it Gospel and vice versa depending on your affiliation.

The main point in all of this is thinking. Proper assessment of the validity of what you are being told requires thought. Is it cigarette or cigar smoke? Holy or hockey? If you think about it, does knowing a person that did something wrong 25-30 years ago mean that you are prone to doing the same thing? Does the fact that a man befriends a plumber mean he cares about the working class? Does the fact that a man is black mean the same thing? Does the fact that a person voted against Martin Luther King Day in his state mean he is racist.

Correlation is not causation. At first glance, the answer to all those questions would be yes; however upon further investigation, they are empty questions and the answers prove absolutely nothing about future events. Its election year with the big day soon at hand and you will hear a WHOLE lot of erroneous, loosely analogous accusations that at first thought sound reasonable, but don't hold water upon further inspection.

Let us think America, for once. You know the reason that the framers of the constitution didn't put the election of the president directly in the people's hands: they said we were fickle and seldom knew what we wanted. This election is TOO important for us to be lollygagging around talking about plumbers and preachers. We need to clean up our economy. We need to mend fences with the entire world. So black folk, I want a black man as president as much as any other brother, but if you don’t feel he is capable, then please don't vote for him. White folk, don’t vote for him b/c he has the right amount of grey hair or he LOVES the working man (really? really? what in the hell about repub's, would lead ANYONE to believe they are for the common man? What is the last thing repub's did for the common man? Free the slaves? Damn, I wanted to write this straight up, but come on! We are not even trying here.) or because he is white.

I am not telling you who to vote for. I am telling you what to do before you walk into that booth. Think, really think, about what you feel is important and which candidate gives it to you. If you love health care but hate black people, vote for Barack! If you like the status quo and feel we shouldn't change power during an unstable economy, but you hate women, go ahead a vote for McCain. It’s the MOST important thing to you. I hate broccoli but if a brother was starving you can cool believe I am eating the damn broccoli. And, ladies and gentlemen this country is starving.

We can do this America! We were manipulated. We were scared and mislead the last 8 years with fake terror "plots" and the like, but it’s never too late to change. Please vote for the right reasons. Reasons that matter to our NATION as a whole not just you, because that is what is at stake. Our National infrastructure, Our Future. Black, White, Hispanic, or Jedi, let's get it right. To have another 4-8 years like the preceding ones would be, well, tragic.

Sincerely, A.B.F.