Headlines...

Bill Clinton to Electorate: "See, don't you kinda feel where I was coming from now?"

Adam "Pac-Man" Jones to recruit Eliot Spitzer for posse

Effigists in foreign countries excited at the opportunity to burn an American president of color in effigy

Report confirms John McCain's 71 years of age said to be "Reagan-esque"; did not confirm Alzheimer's

Kevin Federline said to be father of Jamie-lynn Spears's baby

NYPD Calls off search for Knicks Team's heart; James Dolan's common sense

Joseph said to have been a bit skeptical at his wife's Virginity

God confesses that he has never done anything to affect the outcome of a sporting event however is flattered by the assumption...

Taco Bell is said to have no comment on its recent "Most Racist Franchise" Award

The guy who was shot by Dick Cheney admits he was kinda being a dick that day...

Chicken eats whole human; said it tasted like his brother...

Hillary Clinton to Barack Obama: "Yo' Momma"

February and April have an intervention for March; reports Madness affecting relationship...

Alleged clever blogger makes up ridiculous headlines; no one reads them...

Bruce Eagle the full metal. Peace!!!